Song of a Wounded Heart
I curled up in my study chair with a blanket this morning, ready to start my day with prayer. The day ahead overwhelmed me. I’m emotional, feeling rather uncertain about the release of “my song” to the world today. As I looked out the window, I tried to form words to say to my Lord. Instead, the tears just started dripping down my cheeks.
“Please use this for your glory.”
I know I don’t need to ask. It’s what He promised, and He always keeps His promises. Asking helps me remember though – and helps me push through the pain of obedience.
“Listen,” He said.
The hum of the furnace at first seemed to be the only sound. And then I heard them. Birds of all descriptions erupted in song. Soft coos, stuttering chit-chit-chits, and squawking cries mixed with the melodies of songbirds as they all proclaimed the appearance of the sun. I tried to separate out the sounds and determine how many different types of birds perched in my trees.
All different. Every species made by my Lord.
Each one singing their song.
The soft whistle of the tea kettle reminded me to pour myself a cup of tea. With a steaming cup in my hands, I returned to my chair. The beautiful sounds of the birds competed with the chaotic thoughts of my heart.
This is the beginning of something – it’s like stepping onto a train without knowing its destination.
I opened the book I’ve been reading for my reflection time with the Lord. It’s What if Jesus Meant What He Said? by Nate Bramsten. His topic has been denial of self. This is what I read:
“You hand God a blank contract to do as He wishes with your life, with your dreams, with your relationships, with your death. Remember, His care for you is unrivaled, His power is limitless, his love is eternal, and His wisdom is unfathomable. You can trust Him! The story He wants to paint on the canvas of your life is far greater than you could imagine. And it will be eternally significant.”
Eternally significant. That’s what I want – for God to use our story to lead others to Himself. And I’m confident that’s what my husband, J. L., and children, Janessa and Jayden desire. They have the distinct advantage of seeing the destination of this train from heaven. Perhaps God has even allowed them to see some of the excursions ahead of me on earth.
My thoughts returned to the sound of the birds singing out my window. They don’t know the future either, they are only celebrating the warmth of the sunshine on this cold day with a joyful song.
Ok then. So will I.
“This is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118:24
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May God use this story to sing a song of hope to your soul.